16 August 2015

Sticking Close To Home

The salt water has been washed out of our hair.  Sand was shaken out of the sand toys and bags and shoes.  Beach towels washed, folded neatly and put away, as we whispered softly "see you next season."  We have officially run the travel bug dry, and unofficially placed summer on the shelf.  (The heat is still high, so...)

I've become so used to living out of plastic tubs and suitcases, that having my own space is kind of new to me.  But in a good way.  I'd rather feel like I'm living in a home, rather than passing the time in it.  

It was kind of sad to let go of our lengthy vacation.  I have self-diagnosed separation anxiety.  Anywhere from seeing people off at the airport, or checking out of a hotel room...I feel this enormous void in my chest.  Enormous and oddly heavy, something I can't shake.  I don't know what it is about leaving a thing, such as a hotel room, but it happens.  Leaving my mom's house for the last time this year, and that void was ever so present.  Could be that I had been there for over a month and I became accustomed to the way of life in her house, that making a change was tipping my world upside down.  

But it's different when it's the home where you grew up in for most of your life.  Missing the beach house, like the hotel, is where it becomes hard to understand.  I didn't have my space to sprawl out in.  I shared a bed with a kicking 4-year-old.  I assigned a drawer and shelf space in the fridge for my food.  And I had to leave the house to get my workouts in. *gasp*

It's the routine, and how we settled in.  I get a bit rattled when I have to move on or change things up a bit when I want to stay put. Maybe it's the opportunities that make me more reluctant to let go. Then, I can understand my self-diagnosis.  Now let's talk about this sunrise.  On Saturday morning, I went to the beach one last time.  I thought "You're waking up at 5 to finish packing, and then you will head to the beach.  How often do you get to go there alone??"  Self, point taken.

I walked beyond the pier, because I wanted an unadulterated view of the sunrise.  There, I took some beautiful photos, and played around a little with time lapse.  The walk back was much calmer, because I wasn't trying to beat the timing of a sunrise at this point.  Off went my flip-flops, and I walked with my feet in the water.  I was remembering how I would do this kind of dance with the ocean waves, going parallel down the beach with each one that rolled in.  Using peripherals, I'd watch the waves roll onto the beach and I'd adjust my steps while I ran to avoid getting my Minimus shoes and socks soaked.  

That morning, the waves and my feet met in solidarity, and I allowed it to slow me down.  I wanted to enjoy the ocean and this morning one last time.  And, leaving the water, then the sand, then the dunes and the walkway created that heavy void in my chest.  I looked back, snapped a few more pictures, and said "Good-bye" one last time.

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23 June 2015

My Beastie Friend's Transformation

What is Tuesday without a little transformation post? I just have to give a little shout out to my awesome friend, who wishes to be nameless. ;-)  Because of this awesome community of people, I met her through Facebook and I'm so glad because she has inspired me.  She has worked so hard, kicking some major booty with this program and is down 33 pounds because of it.  

A little back story on my Beastie friend here - Her story is like so many other stories I hear - bad eating habits and NO exercise.  This year, she made the decision to make a change because she was tired of hating herself for the weight gain.  Once she turned those two things around, not only was she headed in the right direction, she was really into it.  She did Body Beast which is my current fitness program.  It's primarily a weight-lifting program with an awesome trainer (whom I get to work out with next month - Eeeeeeek!!!) and you learn everything you need to know.  

Anyway, 90 days is a lot for anyone to dedicate to reaching a goal.  It's hard when you don't get that instant gratification.  But SO worth it.  When you want it BAD enough, you will keep pushing.  She told me that she feels so amazing, and even enjoys little things like taking selfies.  How freaking COOL is that?  She made this decision when she was at the lowest point of her journey, 202 pounds, not truly knowing how it was going to change her LIFE.  Habit formed a lifestyle, and she is changed forever. 

Now, she is on to round 2.  I will be joining her real soon here, as I make my way into Day 75.  Such an inspiration.  I just had to share her story, even if she doesn't want the more public recognition. because I'm so damn proud of this woman right here.

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22 June 2015

Bring It On Back

Summer is in full swing you guys!!!  I can't believe it's been a little over 6 months since I started this revamped fitness journey.  Really hard to believe because I have not even been counting the days til I reached...anything really.  It's just been such a fun process, with expected ups and downs.  And I am REALLY EXCITED to finally be wearing a new swim suit.  I finally felt confident enough to toss my old maternity hybrid swim suit from 8 or so years ago and splurge on 2 new ones.  Huge deal here. 

How about you?  Did you bring sexy back?  Start from the inside, with your diet. No matter what your level of physical activity, you can't go wrong with clean whole foods. That's how we were intended to eat - not processed junk from a box or package. Don't get me wrong - I indulge in stuff that comes from a box every once in a while. Hello, I'm human and I love Oreos! 

Simply D Constructed - 21 Day FixWhen I fall off track, a conscious decision was what got me there. I'm more aware now, more educated in how to eat better and with a purpose.  And it helps me to get back in my lane.  I eat intentionally for my goals now.  Why? GOALS!  I'm the biggest punk and LOVE my food, especially treat days - so if I can do it, anybody can.

Do you have goals you are working towards? Could you use some help? Guidance? Support?  A freaking PLAN? I'm all about helping those who seriously want a change.  I'm opening up my next fitness group to provide all of this and more to 5 people. You give me 21 days, and I will give you all the tools, support and daily motivation to get you there.  You could lose 10+ pounds in 21 days, the healthy way.  And, wine and chocolate fit the meal plan.  Um, yes please!!  
If you think you might be interested, maybe you have a couple more pounds or inches to lose, let me know.  We can get your sexy back. I'll show you how!

Email me for the details.  We will be starting soon!

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01 June 2015

Honest Feet

When my 6-year-old came up to me and said "My feet feel so honest, Mommy" all I could say was "What?"  My poetic child.  She had her shoes off and the grass in our yard (in most parts) feels like lush carpet.  I had never heard such a description of putting your bare feet in the grass.  I had to really think about what she was saying, after I laughed a little over that randomness.  Connected with nature and her surroundings, she was feeling it and had to give a little shout I suppose. Honest Feet 
So, I had to give it a try and imagine what she was feeling. :-D  And I have to admit, it felt nice to kick off the vessels that help shuffle me to and from my "adulting" responsibilities, and to places that require certain standards (ie no shoes no shirt no service).  This moment was freedom.  A chance to observe, relish the moment.  Take myself out of my shoes.  

Kids speak so freely, feel so freely, and are so alive and in the moment.  They can really teach me a thing or two.   

Happy "National Go Barefoot Day!"

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19 May 2015

Transformation Tuesday - July '14 to May '15

Hello Transformation Tuesday!!!
And a pretty important one for me... [I'm actually REALLY hesitant about posting the pic on the left. F it, who cares!? If it helps one of you find the courage to make YOU a priority, then my job is done here.] 
Last year, when I took this pic, I thought "Wow, I am so brave for doing this." Never even got the balls to post it on Instagram, and just left it alone. Originally, I did it to start documenting my progress. In hindsight, I wish I had taken a better pic, but this portrays exactly how I really felt about myself: not confident enough to be in proper lighting, full on, or even smiling for real. 

I think I was about 125 in this pic? Not even concerned about my weight. I was lifting weights at the gym, light cardio, and really just eating without intention. Barely covering the right food groups. In fact, everything was the smell and taste and texture and color of chicken. 

I re-started my journey back in January. Have always been a gym kind of girl for many reasons: wanting to meet like-minded people, getting out of the house, having "me" time while the kids are in child care. Some of you probably understand the life of a stay-at-home mom! But this time when I started back up, I bought workout DVDs. I drank the shakes. I started truly eating better, whole foods. I shifted my priorities back to ME. Back to my health, not my social life. (Though I met some REALLY cool people along the way.) I'm making it work at home because it is a priority to feel good about myself. "Me time" now comes when I push play.

You may turn your nose up at working out at home. Hell, I did the same thing when this opportunity was presented to me. I thought "That's a lot of $ for shakes and workouts!" and "I need to be around other people, not stuck at home!" But you know what? It is more than just those things. When I decided I was ALL in, I committed to investing in my HEALTH. What could possibly be a better investment? My eating and fitness habits morphed into this crazy-fun energetic lifestyle, I'm making awesome gains, and I can't imagine NOT doing this for myself.

The best part is that today, I am the healthiest I have EVER been. I've never cared more about my body as much as I do now. Surprisingly, I am down 9 pounds since I began this year; totally unexpected, but my efforts are proving to be SO worth it! I'm seeing REAL results!

This transformation is my trophy. My competition was on the left, and I came out like a champ on the right today. I am DAMN proud of that. So I ask you --- Would it be worth it to feel so amazing about yourself on the inside, that you can't HELP but transform on the outside? Is there room for tweaking your eating habits? Would you be willing to show up every day, and put in the time for YOU? 30 minutes? 20? Even 10? 

Can I help you? YES! Just ask

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14 May 2015

I Asked For It, They Delivered - Mother's Day Interview

It's 4 days past Mother's Day, though I'm just now getting my post out there into the blogosphere.  Normally I'd forget about it and move on, but this one is too cute not to share with all of my readers (and watchers, if you've subscribed to my channel on Youtube)

I sat down and asked my girls some questions and they had some of the funniest things (in my opinion) to say.  Thanks to my friend Vivian, for giving me this list of questions! 

What is the smartest thing your mom ever told you? 
What kind of stuff is your mom really good at? 
If you could change one thing about your mom what would it be? 
If you could give your mom anything in the world what would it be? 
What do you love to do most with your mom? 
What is one thing your mom should do less of?
What one thing your mom should do more of?
What does your mom do to relax? 
What is your mom favorite drink n favorite food? 
What do you think your mom was like before kids?
What's the craziest thing your mom ever done?
I know my mom loves me because...

 I didn't get all of the questions answered, but at least I know that I apparently I eat too much chocolate, need more socks, and I need to be blinged out.

What would your kids say about you?  What is so off in the video? ;-)

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10 May 2015

These Things We Have To Say

Isn't it funny how you can get so wrapped up in a moment where you don't realize something happened until it's done?  Like you are going through the motions to make it through, but it doesn't truly register until later?

Or maybe it's just me.  When there is something I absolutely do NOT want to deal with, like public speaking, I will have a mental kung fu grip on the moment, focusing so hard that there is no room for meaningless thoughts or pep talks with myself.  It will be alright.

In this case, it was a "see you later" kind of thing.  It's never a good time to say these things, especially if there is nothing you can do about it.  You can't drag it out another hour, push this thing to the following spring, or even 10 years down the road.
See You Later - Simply D Constructed
I had to say this thing tonight.  I was so wrapped up in the moment that my thoughts weren't in line with my emotions until I heard them pull away from my house.  I literally just stood in my office, in shock.  

"She's moving away."

For the past 5 years, she has been 3 hours way.  That's 150 miles from her drive way to mineYou can tell how often we have made that commute. That's many many trips between the two of us. 

And now, Indiana is where they will plant their roots.

The military lifestyle is a hard one for so many reasons.  But the one area I have the most trouble with in this lifestyle is the one where we have to say these things when our time is up.

So there I was, in my office.  TOTAL disbelief.  I didn't act appropriately.  All I could do was hug her.  There were so many other things I wanted to say to her, to comfort her.  If I uttered more than a full sentence, the plug holding in my emotions would have blown off the top and I would have been a mess dealing with those things for myself.

I found myself trying to grasp at and cling to every single memory I could, as if I were falling down a hole and every one of them was flying past me.  She has been around for most of my kids' lives.  She's been my emergency contact.  My road-tripper.  Gallivanting side-kick.  She's been there for me.

Very fitting that it happened to be raining on the day we had to say these things.  I'd hate to otherwise wake up with a sunrise and despise it for being so beautiful, when I feel like I had a hole punched in my chest the sunset before.

I'm typically not an emotional person at face value.  There's always something brewing on the inside, whether it's pure joy or utter despair and sadness, or everything in between.  Happiness is easy to share, though all of the icky emotions stay right where I like to keep them.  It is possible that I became so amazing at keeping the lid on tight in these moments where we have to say these things that make me so uncomfortable in every way.  It is very likely that this has become my defense mechanism in dealing with these things that make my heart ache.

This too shall pass.

I'm not very good with these things that we have to say.  Maybe I'm a little inappropriate and awkward.  Everything rushing to my heart after the moment has passed, and there I am alone with a rolling replay in my mind of what just happened.  If there is a sunrise to look forward to tomorrow, let it bring positive vibes and warmth to my heart.  For I'm aching something awful right now.

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